To Help Him Forget
by Bren Gail
Summary: He wanted redemption. But most of all, he wanted to forget. He needed to forget. She wanted his arrogance, sarcasm, and indifference that he had for so long used as a defense mechanism to return; that Callen she could handle, not the one that stood before her.


_Disclaim...disclaim...disclaim...neither the characters or NCIS: Los Angeles are mine...if it were, Callen would have hugged both Kensi and Nell. ;-)_

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**To Help Him Forget**

As he maneuvered the motorcycle into the curve he pondered what would happen if he turned toward and hit the large tree roughly a yard from the edge of the road; would the crash kill him? With his luck with near death experiences, it would not kill him as he wanted, but would injure his scarred and exhausted mind and body; regardless of whichever would occur, he knew that she would blame herself, because after all, why else would he be in this particular gated community than, because of her, Nell Jones?

He swallowed as he turned away from the tree, passed it, and began to decrease acceleration as he went down the street and passed a stop sign without stopping, not for the first, second, or even fifth time that night. However, the speedometer finally matched the average speed limit of Los Angeles County, however several more MPH than the community speed limit. He wanted to feel his adrenaline pump, the blood rush to his ears, his stomach in his throat, but he was numb to the effects the several mile bike ride. He was so numb it hurt. He wanted to forget it all.

His own house was on the other side of Los Angeles County nearer the beach than this particular land locked community whereas her townhouse was a street over within the community, Hetty had insisted she move into. He knew that Nell would freak, if she knew that Hetty had intimidated the previous owner into giving the Intelligence Analyst a major deal on the three story townhouse with seven bedrooms and five-and-a-half bathrooms, or "The Brownstone," as Hetty called it.

He would never understand the reasoning behind the young woman to have seven bedrooms. He had once approached Nell about it, but Hetty had cut him off saying that it was a good investment and to leave well enough alone; he did not and again asked later, when he knew that Hetty was not in the vicinity. Nell had defensively said it was, because she did not want her large family to stay at a hotel if they were ever to visit her. He had once, about a year ago, agitated her about her finding her Prince Charming and having a litter of baby princes and princesses to fill the large house. That day was one of the few times he had seen her flustered and angry. Incidentally, that was the same day that his favorite Agent, Kensi, had told him that her friend was off limits.

The corners of his lips tilted upward without his accord as the mere thought of the Analyst losing her cool. Her temper was almost as well known as her need for control. She was in control of that temper for the most part, yet he occasionally saw the fire in her eyes that matched the auburn color of her hair and often the color of her lips. Sam had once, six weeks into her employment with NCIS, warned him not to play with that fire or Nell period, because once he was burned, he'd be burned for life; although, he had thus far taken heed to what Sam had said, not to play Nell, he did not comprehend the other part of the metaphor.

The thought of Sam made him grimace. He knew that giving him the slip was not a good idea, in the long run for their friendship. He knew that Sam had risked his career to pull the strings he had pulled so that he, Callen, was suspended pending investigation instead of immediately terminated and court martialed for murdering Marcel Janvier. Thinking the Monster's name made him grip the handle bars tighter and his foot hit the accelerator harder, but the sight of Nell's Cherry Red Mini Cooper parked in her driveway brought him from the edge just as the thought of her guilt had done in the curve a street over.

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_**Thank you for reading. Next part comng soon. **_

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_**On Another Note,**_

_**Are you a Criminal Minds fan as well as a NCIS: Los Angeles one? Ever read fanfiction for Criminal Minds? Did you know that the nominations have started for the Profiler's Choice Criminal Minds FanFic Awards over in the Criminal Minds category on the forum, Chit Chat On Author's Corner? Help choose the best of the best of the Criminal Minds stories on this lovely website. Let your voice be heard, check out the nomination ballot and rules at the Chit Chat on Author's Corner Forum. All rules and information are on the forum.**_

_**- Bren Gail**_


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